Grace

Haven't had alot of time to post as we have been so busy. We are half way done with our foster care classes. Ananya has her pre-op appointment on Wednesday. So her surgery is nearing. Patrick and I are very nervous as it is a big surgery. Our family has never experienced anything like this. Any one who feels lead to pray for us and our precious little girl her surgery is on September 17th.
I've been doing alot of praying lately myself. I know that God has our children picked for us before we even think about it. I always feel lead to pray for our kids before they are ours. I started several years ago while waiting for Ananya. Just a couple of days before we saw her I wrote a letter to my future daughter. I always ask that God simply put our family into these childrens' hearts before we meet so that it will ease their transition with us. I know it will be a hard road even without knowing their past.
I've been thinking of birth parents lately. Ananya and Prasun will most likely never know their birth parents. Our new children will. How to balance a house with so many kids with different stories is something to think about. Adding another culture to our house will be interesting.
I have alot of thoughts lately about foster care and public schools. We are going to have to send any new kids to school until the adoption is finalized. I can't think of a worse time in their life for that. I think that being at home with me and Anthony, Ananya, and Prasun would be a great bonding experience. I could give them individual attention to advance their skills. I could work on their social skills in a positive way. I don't know. I think MY School rocks. It will be way more interesting once enrollment picks up. HEHE.
I always worry about how our kids are going to react to us. Now that we have 3, I worry about how they will react to each other. I worry about if I'm making the right decisions, about discipline, about medical stuff, about homeschooling. Pretty much everything. I just don't want to screw my kids up too badly. Mostly I feel like we are doing pretty good. My kids don't embarrass me too much in public with bad behavior. We have alot of fun. They seem really happy. But there isn't really a way to judge how you are doing raising your children until its done.
I wish I didn't lose my temper so often. I wish I could do more everyday. I wish I was more organized.
By our best effort and God's Grace, we will get the job done that God has put in front of us. It's kind of like a good book to me. I can't wait to see the ending.