Letter to Ananya

My Dear, Sweet Ananya,
Two years have flown by. Two years ago we were united as a family of 4. I can't believe how the time has flown by. It seems like you have been with us forever.
The last 2 years have been filled with some of the happiest, the most stressful, the scariest moments of my life.
I've watched you grow from this little baby to this little girl. I've seen you change from a child who can't crawl to a girl that can do anything. I've seen you learn to crawl and try to walk. I've watched you learn signs and then refuse to use them.
I've never been as scared as the times you've had botox. I dread those days. You, however, are fine. You are such a brave girl. You get IVs and never flinch.
Today we celebrated your 4th birthday.
Happy Birthday Princess!
I hope that today was good for you. I hope everyday is good for you. You amaze me on a daily basis. I can't imagine my life without your smile. Always remember you are a strong girl. You can do anything. Your daddy and I will never stop to get you what you need. You can always lean on us and your brothers. We are a family.
I can't thank your birthmother enough. She made a brave decision. To give you a chance with a new family was brave. I'm so thankful we are blessed to be your family. I wish I could tell Rina what a wonderful child you are. I know she is a beautiful woman to have such a beautiful daughter. Your strength started with your birthmother.
Happy Birthday my sweet baby girl.

Preschool Teacher I Am Not!!

So as part of my goals and plans for the kids in place of preschool, I've made a plan of things I need to be doing at home. I've decided we should do some small craft projects. Even just coloring will work. I thought I would make a gift to send to family. Today we had our first experience with fingerpaint. I have 2 pictures to show for it so I guess it was a success. Also no one at the fingerpaint (it was close though). I'm not a teacher and not creative in the least so this is going to be an experience.
I got some video because pictures were not doing it justice.

Raising a Child with Special Needs

We are coming up on our 2nd Gotcha Day as a family of 4 and have moved on to the adventures of being a family of 5. Our lives have changed so much in the last 2 years.
2 years ago I knew nothing about IEP's, I had never had a child in the hospital or to have surgery. I was pretty much coasting through parenthood as Anthony had been in daycare since about 6 months old. I can't imagine sending him back to school next year. They will be getting a different parent. I don't just trust the teachers to tell me what I need to know. I realize they have different priorities. My job is to raise my children and their job is to raise their children. I still struggle with this with Ananya and Prasun. I'm working on it and will discuss it alittle more later.
My schedule is always busy. I don't think that it has anything to do with special needs. It mostly has to do with me being picky and not wanting to let my children go. I homeschool Anthony and that takes time. I refuse to put Ananya and Prasun in the local preschool. The result is that I have to take them to the school for therapy. I have tried alot to make doctor's appointments on different days for the kids. I'm just learning to juggle 3 and don't want to be distracted when the doctor is talking to me. That has made us have 2 trips to the dentist instead of 1. I made the choice to take Prasun to a different CP doctor versus waiting for the appointment with Ananya's doctor. I decided that being able to do something 3 months sooner was more important than only making 1 trip. I make my life busy with the choices that I think are best for our family. I'd hate to think that anyone would doubt their ability to parent a child because it seems like alot.
I spend alot of time thinking of all the kids that don't have homes. There are so many around the world. I can't stand the thought of it. I wish we could do more. When the time is right, I'm guessing God will push. For now, I do everything possible for Ananya and Prasun.
The biggest part of having a special needs child is being an advocate. That is your first duty. You have to advocate with doctors, therapist, and schools. Its no different than any child. You have to decide what is best for your child and then fight for it. I've decided that the preschool isn't the best environment. If I'm going to send my kids somewhere, I expect them to get alot more than they are getting at home. Sitting and watching other kids wasn't in Ananya's best interest. For now, the kids stay home. Maybe in August or sometime after we could try school again.
Frustration and worry are part of being a parent. I get so frustrated with Anthony that it doesn't get close to what I feel with Ananya or Prasun so far. I worry anytime Anthony is gone. It is alittle more real when Ananya has Botox done, but it could be anything with Anthony and I'd be in the same place. Alot of days I doubt my ability to raise toddlers/preschoolers. I know that alot of mothers do.
All kids have special needs. They all need special attention at one time or another. All kids go through the same stages. They all grow up. Sometimes it seems too slow and sometimes it seems too fast. Some days I feel like both of these are true at the same time.
I just think everyone should look at special needs children. Looking won't hurt. The child would never know. You aren't getting their hopes up. Just look. What if you could find your child on the list. It could change your future. At the very least, you can pray for these children to find their families. Pray for them to be healed.

The Adventures of Scooter and Pirate Pete

Today has just been one of those days.
This morning I had to crawl out of my nice warm bed at the butt-crack of dawn (6:30 is early to me anyways). I had to get ready and get the kids ready to be out of the door by 7:45. I'm not good at mornings. We needed to be at the eye doctor for Prasun at 8:15. We made it out of the house 10 minutes late which is good for us. After I got the kids dressed, Prasun was sitting in the floor and he was soaked. I didn't get his diaper on great because he wakes up with alot of muscle stiffness and keeps his legs bent. I had to change his pants because I didn't take the 2 seconds to make sure his diaper was even and tight. I know better but was trying to rush. I was only 5 minutes late for the eye appointment by the time I dragged the stroller out from under 100 lbs of dog food and 50 lbs of kitty litter.
When I got into the eye doctor, I found out I was a day early. I can't keep track of the date (I did know it was Wednesday). I could have sworn today was the 12th. They were nice enough to work us in. We were out by 9:00. Thats good for any of our appointments. I can't believe that I didn't realize the appointment was Thursday. I have all this on the calendar on my phone and have looked at it about 400 times in the last week.
The doctor said that Prasun's eyes seem to be getting better. She has us patching his eye for about 2 hours a day. We are trying to increase the strength in his left eye. She told me today that he isn't seeing well, but since she didn't put him in glasses I'm guessing it is a muscle thing and not a sight thing. Oh well. This is her specialty.
Last night a pipe burst so we didn't have some water until P could get home from Home Depot with the cap for the pipe. I didn't give the kids a bath because we had the water turned off for about 2 hours. I put the kids in the bathtub when we got home from the doctor. I got them all cleaned up. I put Ananya in her walker to stand for a while. I'm missing one of her knee immobilizers. I saw it Monday and can't remember where I put it. She did very well with just 1 knee immobilizer. I put Prasun's eye patch on and of course after the bath and lotion the bandaid wouldn't stick. I tried to get Prasun to color but he just wanted to rip the paper up.
Yesterday we stopped at the park on our way home. It was such a nice day. Temps in the 70's. It was the first time Prasun has felt sand. I wasn't sure how he would handle the texture. He didn't mind it. He did fall while trying to crawl through the sand ended up with sand in his mouth. Ananya liked watching the kids at the park run and play. Prasun also did well on the swings. I wasn't sure if he would like them. He sat in the swing well though.
I included the pictures that I could. I've lost a USB cord. It is driving me crazy because I can't get the pictures off my camera without getting a disk made. Thats 3 dollars and a trip out of my way. If I don't find the cord soon I guess I can buy a new one. I hate to do that though. I'm cheap.
the 2nd and 3rd are the reason for the name of the post. Ananya scoots around all the time and Patrick calls her Scooter. While we were in PA, my grandma decided to call Prasun "Pete" because she can't remember Prasun. We use a pirate patch to keep Prasun from pulling off his eye patch so he is Pirate Pete.
I'll post more later. I've got some things to say as we are getting toward Gotcha Day. February 15th. A big day for our family.