I've Picked My Next Race

Actually I've found a couple.
August 30th 2008 I'm running here. Its a 5K in town. This of course is only if I'm in the country. I'd love to run the race and get my baby. I don't know how its going to work. Oh well. This is just a little extra incentive and a check on how my training is going.
November 8th 2008 I'm running 10K on the Lenior Greenway. I'm actually very excited because it means that my training is increasing and I'm gaining endurance.
The next step is what I'm really looking forward too. HERE!!!! I'm so excited because I've never been to this town. Normally it would be too commercial but its perfect for my half marathon. I've been told the course is relatively flat. I'm used to running on hills so maybe I'll make good time.
My training is going good. I felt like I had breakthrough this week. Nothing big. I've just felt so much better during my training. I've felt like I'm getting a little bit smaller, that will help with my running.
I'm so excited about this. I love my new hobby.

Botox is Done!!!!!!!!

Alternate Title: Giving Your Children to God
This isn't today. Its from our first trip but isn't she cute.
Ananya underwent botox injections to her hamstring this morning for the third time. She is doing awesome. I must say though that this isn't getting any easier.
I'll get real for Angel like she did in this post.
Essentially, for us, having a child with special needs isn't difficult. We are very lucky. I knew that this morning as I walked into Brenner's Childrens Hospital. My children, all 3 of them, are healthy. We have never had more than random fevers, strep throat, Scarlett fever, and malaria. The babies were frail when they were little, but the orphanage took care of that well before we got them. We have 2 diagnosis of seizure disorders and not a seizure among them. God has blessed us so much. The procedures that we have are optional. They are to try and increase range of motion and increase function. It has worked wonderfully so far.
We go to therapy anywhere between 1 and 3 times a week. All of this is gravy.I mean it's not much more than raising Anthony was. I enjoy so much every milstone that Ananya accomplishes and can't wait to add Prasun to the family to watch him grow. Cerebral Palsy at this level is very managable. Its not scary, like most people think. We fully anticipate Ananya and Prasun to lead normal lives. We just have to keep working to get them there.
The botox injections test me. You see I'm a nurse. Watching them start the IV is fine. Not a problem. I watched one time while they put sutures in Anthony's head just an inch or 2 away from his eye. I was ok mommy wise. This morning however the hospital staff just about had to peel me off the ceiling. After the IV, they gave Ananya her sleepy-time medicine. She was looking around 1 minute and then there was the glazed over look. I think I ran out of the room. I know I hustled out. I must have had a look because the Dr got my attention to say they would take good care of her and be done in few minutes. I paced the waiting room for about 20 minutes. I only sat down because someone else came in and I knew they were waiting to have the same procedure. I didn't want to freak their 2 kids out.
I'm even fine when they let me come back before she wakes up. I don't mind standing next to her for like 30 minutes trying to get her to wake up. I'm completely fine. Its just the time that she is asleep. It is so scary for me. When I'm at work I handle most things fine. Function very well understress. Take good care of patients. I have no problem with unstable patients, except when its a breathing thing. I feel trapped when the problem is their lungs. I can't intubate them. I can do the whole bag thing for breathing, but I can fix the problem. Heart stuff, I have drugs and can kind of get things going in the right direction. Breathing is another story. So I guess I kind of freak everytime Ananya has botox because they get out the ambu-bag. That scares me.
I deeply admire everyone whose kids have had any kind of surgery. Like I said, we are so lucky. We are doing an elective outpatient procedure. They don't do any cutting. Its just some little shots. This really is the little stuff.
I'm so glad that this mornning is over. In a month, when we go for the post-op visit, I'll push to have the procedure re-done in 4 months instead of 6 because Ananya gets so tight. I'll hold her while they put in the IV, pace the waiting room during the procedure, and kiss my baby repeatedly for the first minute I'm back in the room. I'll pray for her during the procedure. I'll pray for myself. God gave me peace today. I just knew she would be ok. I am just trying to control a situation that I have no control over. I know that my kids are just a loan from God. They are His. I'm just a fiercely protective momma bear.

This Quiz is Funny!

What would you do with your money?

1 Corinthians 6:19-20

Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit,who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not yourown; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body.
I thought that I would add this verse for some reflection. I've been training some lately, not for the any particular reason. I run because I can. I think thats a great reason. There are alot of people who aren't free to move. I'm blessed by this gift.
A

Hard Lessons I should have learned when I was 3..

Yesterday morning I took Ananya for a walk in the town we live in. I drove into town thinking I would stop at the Farmers Market then go for a walk. Well the market doesn't open until 12:30 and it was like 9:00. So I set off and decided to finally get Ananya put on our YMCA membership (I just haven't gone in the last 18 months) and pick up the application for Anthony for soccer camp. Well I decided to walk. Before I even got to the Y I realized I really didn't want to walk. If my husband would have been at work I would have called him to come pick us up. We made it back to the car just fine. It wasn't that bad.
Lesson for the day. Don't walk any farther than you want to walk back.

Prayers needed.

If you browse my links then you have probably met Jocelyn and Issac. Please keep Issac in your prayers over the next few days and weeks. He had his surgery to correct some of his spinal problems. Its a very tough surgery.
Jocelyn is awesome. I'll keep her in my prayers. Its never fun for me when Ananya has botox let alone a spinal surgery.

Another Voice on Special Needs

Adopting a special needs child is a journey full of adventures, unknowns, ups and downs, frustrations, and great celebrations. Come to think of it, parenting in general is the same journey! My favorite response to people when they voice concerns about adopting because of the health adopted children is that there is no perfect person. All of us have imperfections and special needs. We envision a very healthy, attractive, and smart child whose personality meshes fluidly with ours. We can easily review medical information on a child and piously think that good old American food, medicine, and a loving family will ensure positive outcomes. Certainly that can and does happen. My Korean-born daughter was a thirty week, three pound preemie. We were aware that there could be some unknowns, in her future. She received excellent care before coming to us and for that we are so grateful. She is super healthy and smart! However, this does not always happen. Some children arrive with undiagnosed medical or developmental conditions. Our Korean-born son had minor medical conditions on his paperwork. After he had been with us for several months, we discovered more involved medical and developmental hurdles he must overcome. He is just as much a miracle to our family as our daughter. His life is always a struggle compared to other children his age. We have altered family plans and even our residence to ensure access to the best available resources. He has taught us that love doesn’t need words to be expressed, that we must be aware of the small things that cause some children great distress, and to celebrate every milestone he reaches, no matter how delayed they are. I’ve opened my eyes to all the awesome children in the world deserving families, but nobody wants to parent them because of special needs.

Now, off my soapbox and on to practical words. As a Christian, I believe that God leads us to the children he ordained for us to parent. We prayed for God to show us where to adopt from and what agency. After researching many agencies, word of mouth recommendations led us to Dillon International. Find an agency willing to answer all the technical questions before you get deep into the process. Talk to families who have used the agencies you are interested. When considering a waiting child, find a doctor willing to openly review and discuss the paperwork. Fax the info to Dr. Dana Johnston in Minnesota. His clinic is very experienced with international adoption. Remember, though, no matter what opinions the medical community gives you, the call of God to adopt a certain child is undeniable. Sometimes the reports we get from doctors is discouraging. God can work wonders to heal, supply grace, patience, and resources when He calls you to adopt a special needs child.

Just because a child has some challenges, that child is not defined by his/her circumstances. Special needs children are real, whole people who deserve to be loved and appreciated beyond the diagnosis.

This post was written by Libby S of Texas. She is wife to Mike and the mom to 3 wonderful children, Carter, Abby and Dillon. Thanks Libby for your input.

Some Remodeling and Tid bits

I've been working on re-formatting all my blogs a little. I've even added to Anthony's Blog. You should be able to visit different sites by clicking on the pictures in the sidebar. I've added a couple of lists like my workout schedule for the week and books that I would like to read. Funny enough I added the book list because I keep writing lists lately and forgetting where I've put it. I can't ever find a book I want at the library if I keep forgetting the name.
I've been blogging for Red Letter Campaigns, or at least started. I've offered to open my blog to some friends I've met through our adoptions to put their thoughts out there. I know some great writers and didn't want the world to miss what they have to say. I should have a new post up on special needs adoption tomorrow. I didn't want to confuse people with pictures of family's that aren't mine.

I Finished My First Race.

OK. Not the best picture. This is the race tag from my very first 5K. I finished my race on July 4th in 39:45. Its not the world's fastest time, but I finished. I'm happy to have finished. I'm going to register for a 10K November 8th. I'll try to remember to take some pictures next time. My goal is to finish the Marine Corps Marathon in 2009. I'm really excited because I've wanted to do this for several years now. I just wasn't using my brain because I never broke it into smaller goals. Now I've got the 10K, then in the spring I'll do a half marathon around here and that will give me at least 5 months to build up to the whole 26.2 miles.

The vision must be followed by the venture. It is not enough tostare up the steps - we must step up the stairs.-- Vance Havner

Special Needs Adoption

OK. I'm going to be quite frank in my answer to the blogbuzz question this week. We chose special needs adoption not once but twice now. I have no doubt that given the opportunity, we will chose this route again. I don't think my husband and I ever thought of adopting a healthy white female newborn. Heck, I never even thought of adopting a healthy Indian (or any other nationality) child for that matter.
In locating our agency, we went through the waiting children files online. Constantly. On as many sites as possible.
I looked at sibling groups and older children. I looked at every disability you can think of.
Our agency, Dillon, has a special needs checklist that you fill out with the formal application. Ours had alot of Maybe's, a few (probably 5) no's, and then some yes. In filling in that checklist, I had 1 thing on my mind. Would I parent this child if I gave birth to them. The answer to that question was almost always yes. Even the few No's, I know that we may have accepted a referral. I know without a doubt that we would have parented a biological child.
This is where my reasoning gets frank.
I can not think of many situations where I could give my child up for adoption. I know of a couple people I work with who have been faced with tough situations. The ones where one child will physically and intentionally hurt you or your other children. That is the only situation where I feel like I have to say no. I don't feel like I can tell God himself that He is wrong. We had such peace about both of our adoptions that we are certain that God is giving us these children to raise.
Now on to what to do with a special needs referral:
1-find a doctor to talk to. If the first one won't take the time, then find another one. The same goes for therapists.
2-Research the condition. Find out what the medical community is doing with it today. This is important. There may be new treatments in the last couple years. There maybe new tests. There may be clinical trials. It is worth looking into while you have the time.
3-Contact your health insurance. You may be able to get a nurse who does case management. This way you know what is covered, what is not, if there are limits you need to be aware of.
4-Find the doctors who you want to treat your child.
5-Find out who does evaluations for early intervention and smart start through our state and county. I figure, I pay taxes then I should get my share of the services.
6-This is actually the most important. PRAY about it. Ask for God to lead you through the decision. Some days it is a hard road. Other days are great.
I don't think that my family has done anything special by adopting special needs children. They are the light of our lives. I don't feel like my son gets any less because his sister has a disability. I think he has grown because of it.
I would love to see more people adopt special needs/waiting children. It is an awesome experience.